Raising Girls

I recently read a post on the site Femina about little girls and how to navigate their behavior especially with other girls. They put up a list of questions they ask their daughters when they get home from school and I love it. So I am hijacking the list and copying it here. It is a great read to remind you of the things to remember to address on a regular basis with girls.

From Femina:


"Here’s a general idea of our after-school conversation.

Whom did you play with at recess?

What did you play?

Whose idea was it to play that?

Is she the one who’s usually in charge?

Did she exclude anyone when she set up the game?

Who was not playing with you?

Why weren’t they playing?

Was it because they didn’t want to, or because they weren’t included?

Were they not included for a good reason or a bad reason?

Did anyone get angry?

Why?

Did anyone say anything rude about someone else?

Did anyone say ugly things about their brothers or sisters?

Did you say ugly things about your brothers or sisters?

Did you stand up for your sister the way you were supposed to?

Did you look out for the lonely girls the way you were supposed to?

Did you ignore the boys the way you were supposed to?

Did you tell the bossy girl to knock it off the way you were supposed to?

Did you do that cheerfully or fussily?

When the girl with the potty-mouth said that, did you laugh, or did you tell her not to talk that way?

Did you do that cheerfully or fussily?

Did you handle the fussy boy the way Daddy told you to?

It’s incredible what a round of questions like that will turn up, and I can almost guarantee you that the answers will give you at least one very complicated ethical problem to work through, not least of which is how much credence you give to your own daughter’s rendition of the situation. But if you don’t ask the questions and wrestle your way through the answers, you’re basically leaving your daughter to fight her way through the jungle on her own."


Really thoughtful. We haven't had much of this with Renata because she isn't in school but even at church we had to address a "girls only club" issue that had the makings of trouble. Sometimes I am so glad I only have one then my son pees all over the bathroom and I switch my position.

Carolina Chocolate Drops

Joffre and I have been loving listening to the Carolina Chocolate Drops. Joffre got to do an interview with Dom Flemons about pipe smoking and was pleased as punch.

We saw an interview about their tour in Europe and thought it was interesting that when they asked each audience whether they wanted a "slow" show or a "fast" show all of them said "fast" except the Irish audiences. They all wanted a "slow" show. Love those Irish.

Thrift Store Finds

 Love these shoes! $2 and they have cushioned soles and everything. ( I know, I am a 30 year old old woman.)
 

This picture doesn't do this vintage 70s/80s coat justice.$5. It's super fun with pleats and belt.

This is the new dress I just made for winter. I'll try to get some better pictures. It was the hardest thing I have tried to sew yet.I should have chosen a different pattern because I haven't figured out how to line up patterns on the fabric where I want them yet.

I also just got a manual lawn mower (yea!, no gas) for $30 after our gas one quit on us. It is in very good shape. I also got some great books including some great Dorothy Sayers books.

Raisins and Self Control

Today two of my children asked me to let them help make breakfast. I was making oatmeal and I don't let any of them help with the stove right now but I told them they could put their own honey and raisins on their oatmeal. I thought to myself, I hope this is not a bad idea. I was concerned about their self control with the sweet honey and raisins.

I finished cooking and handed them the honey and raisins saying, " Be moderate and don't be greedy." (Note: I did not let the two year do it on his own.)

Renata was first and had to be told to put on more and the others followed very carefully and so happily to be doing it themselves. It may seem silly to blog about but it was just a moment that I was just so proud at their self control and obedience.It's moments like that that make me happy as a mom.

Joffre Jr. also announced to us that only bees know the recipe for honey.

I saw this link on a friend's facebook and was floored. Planned parenthood is so shocking. When did it become a bad idea to be a mom and a mom who takes care of her own children?

Books I am reading

I am in the middle of reading too many books but happy that at least I am really loving each one. I don't like dividing my mind between so many thoughts but I suppose I won't explode.

1. Reading Between the Lines by Gene Edward Veith Jr.- this is a guide to how Christians should view literature and some examples of great authors in a christian tradition. This is terrific! A very thoughtful look at what you are reading without a foolish fear of fiction or portrayal of sin. Flannery O'Conner and Annie Dillard are some of the featured writers. I am really excited about getting his book about art, The State of the Arts.

2.Clouds of Witness by Dorothy Sayers-In light of reading about good fiction I am enjoying this fun mystery.I love Dorothy Sayers.

3. Recovering the Lost Tools of Learning by Douglas Wilson- I have been meaning to read this for years but just now finally got my hands on a copy. ( I would like to interject here that is is wicked to highlight a book in bright pink. Your books will be passed on to another some day so don't be so cruel.) This is a great read about how to think about the education of your children and the serious troubles in public school.

4.The Cat of the Bubastes by G.A. Henty- I started reading this one to the kids. It is a historical adventure story set in the Egyptian time period. Joffre Jr was enthralled because the beginning is a battle. He was much less excited when we read The Secret Garden. Renata is quite the opposite.

New Purse

I made this purse for the fall even though it looks totally springy. I might try to make another plain brown one really for the fall but in the mean time I really like this one.

More Ask Doug

If you have read my blog for a bit you know I respect Doug Wilson a lot and I love listening to his Ask Doug question/ answer series. I especially like that they are short enough to listen to between child interruption. Anyway, I wanted to point out two that I particularly liked. This one one establishing a faithful christian culture in the home and this one about whether you should pray for trials to go away.

Pumpkin

My new favorite habit is asking Ward to say the word pumpkin. It comes out "Puntin?" ( for some reason it is always a question.) He also always thinks they are apples when he sees one.
"Apple, Mom, apple," he says pointing at one.
"No, pumpkin. Can you say, Pumpkin?" I say.
"Puntin?".
"Yes, puntin."

Be still my beating heart.

The Nightmare of the Penguins

Last night Renata came into our room crying because she had a nightmare. I was hugging her and telling her it was ok when Joffre asked her what the nightmare was about. She said, "Well there was this war and you (Joffre) were going off to fight....and I was a baby penguin and you were a big penguin..." She continued to explain what happened but I (I am ashamed to admit) had to stifle some serious giggle urges. I just had an immediate image of a cute fluffy penguin with a rifle.

We have recently watched The March of the Penguins, the movie about emperor penguins. The movie is a great nature film about how the father penguin takes care of the egg all winter till the mom comes back in the spring. It shows some of the babies dying from exposure and being eaten by birds and seals. (I admit I had to close my eyes when the seagull killed the baby penguin slowly.)I think it might have tramatized poor Renata.